Friday, April 30, 2010

I really need some ADULT advice about dating younger men, from older women if possible..??

I know I already asked this question but I think mostly unexperienced teens answered


I need some dating tips, what should I expect from a younger guy early 20's, what should I not do, what is the downside to this type of relationship ?


Do I have to wait for them to mature, or can I mold him..?? If you've dated or married a younger guy, please adviseI really need some ADULT advice about dating younger men, from older women if possible..??
I married a guy younger than me. He will want to play more. Most guys in their early 20's are still into things like video games and it isn't something you can just break them of over night. Don't talk about marriage and kids because it will send him running for the hills. Play it cool. And what ever you do, don't start acting too bossy or nagging him. If you are much older than him, all he will see is that you are trying to be his mother. Dating a younger guy and even marrying a younger guy can be wonderful. They aren't whipped by the responsibilities of the world so they are more care-free and they can add more spice to your life. Just remember that while an older woman dating a younger man can put you into a different category with your friends, it can do the same for him. Be prepared. If there are quite a few years between the two of you, don't be surprised if his own peer group have some snarky comments about you dating. From somewhat nice (hey, it's Stiffler's Mom) to calling you a cougar. If you don't know these references, Stiffler was a character in the movie American Pie and one of his friends got the priviledge of sleeping with his mom. A cougar is a slang term to describe a 35+ year old female who is on the ';hunt'; for a much younger, energetic, willing-to-do-anything male. If this does happen, just chalk it up to the fact that they are threatened by you and have fun. Be mindful that many men, regardless of age, are out to have fun but not necessarily in for a relationship. Make sure you establish what you are after first. If all you want is a man that can go all night, you will find some one out there eager to prove they can. If you want the relationship thing, it can get a little tougher. Most men in this age group are not looking for the domestic bliss relationship. Sowing their wild oats and making memories is for them. If you are lucky you will find a 22-23 year old and have a few good years of fun and then he will mature into the guy who is ready to marry. That's how it happened for me. Now we have wedded bliss but my guy is still in his 20's and I am in my 30s so the fun still continues. Good luck and remember that the best way to approach any relationship is to think about the person first, age second. Have fun.I really need some ADULT advice about dating younger men, from older women if possible..??
First of all what's your age, I'm 45 and i, myself would not date 20 year olds, or around that age, because i would feel like if he is like my son's age. Maybe 35 year olds or older sounds better. Good luck
Early 20's? Well, they are still basically unsure of themselves and the world around them. Depending on the kind of guy you get, he's probably more into having fun and collecting possessions.





Don't make references to the age gap, remember that he's probably a little sensitive to it as well. It's not unlike dating someone your age so just go with what feels comfortable.





Have fun, don't try to mother or mold him, he'll resent it if you do.
well, i'm your girl for this Answer. I haven't dated (or married!) anyone close to my own age since i was 23. I've always dates younger men, by choice. I've always been more attracted to them %26amp; vice versa.





Anyway, my second marriage was to a man 6 years my junior...although we're now divorced, it had absolutely nothing at all to do w/his age. we also have a lovely daughter....we were married/together for about 10 years.





I am now again married to another man, only he's 9 years younger(!) -- %26amp; HE'S THE BEST.





bear in mind when you date a younger guy -- esp. one in their 20's (which I also did when I was nearing 30 %26amp; fell MADLY in love with), you have to understand that they may still have to sow some wild oats %26amp; may not be ready to settle down, if that's what you're looking for (or even commit to one woman)...a few are mature enough to know what they want, whether it's a future w/you or not will tell you if you ask, which is good (but don't have that conversation too early on in the relationship -- you'll scare the snot ouf of the poor thing!).





IMO, each man should be judged invidividually by what YOU expect. be frank %26amp; honest with yourself %26amp; any potential guy %26amp; you won't go wrong. DO NOT try to manipulate, convince or 'wait it out' w/some youngster that you're smitten with %26amp; want to keep forever if he's not thinking the same thing! it won't work %26amp; you'll be the one getting hurt in the end.





I wouldn't count on the whole 'molding' thing either -- people don't ever truly change...sure, they grow %26amp; mature, but basically stay the same deep down inside.





i hope this was helpful.





if you have any more questions, feel free to ask ;-)
I have dated a younger guy. I had problems from the get-go. Most younger men are immature and you can be my guest to try and mold them but its hard! They have a tendancy to be controling and want to know your every move. And when it comes time for an anniversary forget it! They will be spending that night out with their buddies drinking or at a club. Also, if they are in their early 20's means they probably don't have a career yet. So be prepared to eat out at McD's alot and get cheap gifts. You will be the bread winner hunny! However since they are younger, sometimes they are pure and sweet. They havent had the chance to become bitter by the world and often want to have fun! So there are ups and downs just like any relationship. I certainly don't regret dating a younger guy, but it just didnt work out for me. Good luck!
A few years ago, I dated a guy young enough to be my son. Though he wanted to continue the relationship, I broke it off pretty quickly. We had very few things in common (we both liked coffee and hockey), and very different viewpoints on everything. We simply did not see the world the same way. I would get impatient with him, and then realize it was just his lack of life experience. So, my impatience was unfair, but it was still there. I really don't know how you develop a true partnership kind of relationship with someone from a different generation.
they'll do you like any young kid would cuz older women are a novelty. then they will get tired of the novelty and dump you for someone their own age. by the time they mature, they will say, ';what am I doing with this old bag?'; so if you want to have a fling, go for it, but dont expect anything beyond that.
One recommendation--don't keep referring to the age difference, such as ';Oh, when I was your age...';
His education, work, and the meaning of fun might be different from yours. Expect that he might not be able to call you 24/7 or he might be the type to call 24/7. And in the time when he can't reach you or you reach him. Patient is a must. Next thing to think about is money. He doesn't having saving, so long vacation or even buying a ticket is a problem. So the budget of a marriage, honeymoon, or even having a child will be a problem in time wise.
Consider yourself damn lucky is you find a 20 some year old guy that has a strong direction to life, knows how to budget money, has no issues, isn't clingy and is wise beyond his years.
My 'adult' advice is that unless you enjoy the fact that your younger guy is a boy toy for you and can overlook his immaturity or embrace it, you shouldn't waste your time. Molding him? Most of us have a rough time 'molding' our kids; why would you even want to worry about molding your significant other? Well, I have an ex-sister-in-law who I love who is also into 'younger' men...she's presently dating a guy who is not so much younger and I really believe she is starting to 'get' it. The conventional wisdom about not being able to change anyone but yourself holds true -- no matter the age of the subject!!! If you just want the thrill of the chase and the fact that you are still appealing enough to 'score' with a younger guy, you go for it...just keep the molding and sculpting for an art class! Personally, I'm much more attracted to older and monied -- you know, those mature guys who know how to wine and dine a woman and understand romance...
I have dated younger guys, and the sex was awesome, but they seemed to have too much baggage for me (being an older woman). Most were dealing ex wives and child support or bad credit etc.. stuff I didn't want to deal with. Not saying ALL young guys are in the same situation. As for maturity, good luck finding that in a man at any age.
I'm not sure on what to tell you...





But I am 27 currently dating a 36 year old woman. It's pretty good. No complaints.





Before that I was dating a 20 year old girl. That is something I will never do again.





Early 20's should be okay for you... depending on your age... I mean if you're 50 something that would be bad.





And the suggestion to not keep referring to the age difference is great advice.
Hi, I'am Marissa 34 female from Wisconsin, and am seeing Corey and he is 18 going on 19. I'am divorced for 3 years. I have never been so happy. I feel free and young again. With Corey, my first and only young guy, I had to make all the moves. I was nervous at first, but it turns me on. Email us if you want, Myself and my Corey can answer anything.
';Mold '; him?


No, he is too old and you might make him jump hoops for sex but after the orgasms are over your magic powers over him are gone for good.


Thats a fact hon I have seen it too often.First treat him with respect and expect him to be immature and childish at times, he is still growing.


Also, no sex for that will really confuse things and neither of you will think and see things as they are.You will have too much emotion invested before getting to know one another.


This is just common sense hon.
First





you should expect from him to want to have SEX ... mucho.. that's the every guy's dream, hook up with an old lady





Second





Do not say ';omg you're like a little kid for me'; or ';when I was your age'; or stuff like that.. never talk about the age difference





third





the downside is if he is not really in love with you .. he will prolly leave you and find a young girl later after messing around with you... usually to be with an older women is just a fantasy for most men so If he is serious about you, everything is gonna be okay... so if you are looking for something serious you better make you how he feels about you if you dont want to get hurt...





Good luck
Go with the flow-
I married a younger guy we have been together 30+ years it is just like any relationship you get what you put in . If you are looking for someone to mold I say forget about it. You have to start with someone who can have a conversation after sex or you will get bored. Men mature at different ages just like women so maybe his age doesn't matter. My husband is 5 years younger but he has always been more mature then his age . What can he offer you or do you have bring everything to the table? You can have a baby, you don't need someone to raise.
I almost said, ';Some Lube';. But I really have no idea.
I think if you want a serious realtionship looking for a guy in his early 20's probably isn't the best way. For most guys that age, marriage or being tied down in a relationship is the last thing that they want. So, make sure from day one that you both are on the same page. Also, trying to ';mold'; someone isn't a good idea. You should like the person for who they are, not for what you want them to be. I have no idea how much of an age gap you are talking about here...
It depends on the circumstances!





First of all, you CANNOT ';mold'; him!! Don't EVER go into any relationship with the intent of trying to change someone! It probably won't happen and you will end up very frustrated!!





My girlfriend (42) dated a younger guy (24). It was the biggest mistake of her life! She ended up being nothing but a fantasy he was trying to fulfill. Once he had accomplished that, he dumped her. His excuse....I want a family and you cannot provide that for me. Although he was correct, he used her for sex and broker her heart.





Another friend (37) dated a younger guy (25) and ended up getting married to him. They are still married 7 years later and very happy. They have 2 children together.





You just have to be careful and be sure that you are both looking for the same things.
First you shouldn't be going into any relationship trying to decide if you should mold someone. Date the person and stop trying to predict what to do. If it's going to work it will.
I am 40 and I married someone who is now 52. She is the most beautiful person I have ever met. I can't imagine life with a younger woman. I had dated a lot of them too.
Whenever I encounter younger men I don't think about the age difference. I've dated several and enjoy the company, but eventually we have to socialize with our friends, that's when the age difference becomes an issue. There are a number of young men who are more mature and experienced than men my age. I would rather date them but I wouldn't establish a long term relationship. It wouldn't be fair to the guy who will be stuck with a senior citizen in 20 years or more. When I meet a young man I usually establish the boundaries up front , saves having a long heart wrenching goodbye.
If you think you need to 'mold' someone you are the immature one and need to work on your own life before ruining someone else.
well i am 46,and my partner off 19 months is 35,we never mention ages or nothing like that,wow hon the first thing you must not do is try to mold him,,he is a human being just the same and if he wants too date an older woman fair be it,we have a great relationship,and one off the most important things is too never go on and on about the age difference,,why should you anyway,you are together because you want too be,if you keep on n on about it do you want to be like his mother,,,,,anyway good luck too youxxxxxxx
I dated a guy that was 3 years younger than me. It was very hard. It went on for 4 months...we had fun...but then we had some issues too. Like when we hung out with his friends..they are all his age. It made me feel a little weird cause I wasn't into what they were. Plus he wasn't 21 yet, so we couldn't go to the places that I wanted to. Some ladies can date younger guys..and it works for them. but just be careful...he might pull the ';i'm not ready for that yet';, or ';i'm going to a house party'; stuff like that. Molding isn't going to happen, but you can just tell him exactly what you look for in a guy and find out if you guys can make it. Good Luck.

TRUST???? I need advice from both men and women?

i'm married to a women that i thought was just everything. One day i was getting rid of some stuff after we moved in our home i found some of her old cell bills.And what i saw was shocking. I saw this same # listede several times,so i did a call and acted like i dailed the wrong # just to see who is was and he told me who he was, and i asked a mutual friend of ours to check it out and come to find out is that she was talking and supposelty see him. I confronted her about this and she just flat out lied about and continued to lie for about 3 months. They talked for 5 months about 900-1000 mins a month. So finally after i stayed on her for the truth se said it was nothing seriuos.. She claimed she never met him ect. I still didn't feel right and finally broke down and told her that i think kthat she was still lying, and then she said i met him only once '; he came by my work'; unannounced, which to me was creepy. Now my problem is i still feel that there was more to it. y did she hide itTRUST???? I need advice from both men and women?
I would say that they possibly did have something going on and may still have. I would sit quietly and let her get comfortable. Do your homework. Show up at home unannounced, gather bills, check credit card statements, follow her, etc.





On the other hand, if you suspect nothing is going on anymore and you want to stay with your wife, I would let it go. Perhaps she has realized she made a mistake and wants to forget about. Like I said though, I would do your homework.





Good luck!TRUST???? I need advice from both men and women?
I think there`s definitely more to it. Lying to avoid the truth which is painful to her now that she`s not talking to him anymore, is easier for her and she hid it from you out if fear of repercussions.
You didn't say if the cell bills were from prior to your marriage or engagement. If they were, you have no control over that. If they weren't, you must decide if you want to trust her or not. It's always a choice.
she was totally wrong for acting that way.


1. no secrets in a relationship-hiding phone bills, meeting other people, etc.


2. she hid it from you because she knew it was WRONG and that she would lose you


3. actions are louder than words
maybe you should stop with the anger and such like and find out what the reason was for her to communicate with this man... some do it because of marriage issues and others because of other problems or needs...





perhaps you should try being more understanding...





she obviously needed something you couldn't provide...





try to find out what that is/was...
She's told you many lies. She's hiding the truth because she's guilty and she knows it.
If you're going to deal with this issue, at least be adult about it. You know exactly why she hid it, so stop acting so surprised. Either you're going to get over this and get on with the marriage, or you're going to drag your wife through the mud and destroy any chance of salvaging your relationship with her.





Before you discovered this information, you were a happy man. Accept your wife's word, when she says it was nothing serious and move on. Nothing can be gained from prolonging the agony.
WOW...go to therapy and if they think you 2 have a chance fine BUT she is a liar...how can you live with a liar...she has made a fool out of you and you are not happy...find someone who will make you happy that you can trust...trust is the most important thing in a relationship! And usually once a liar always a liar..like one a cheat always a cheat........and iof you doupt something..do not do it..it is God telling you no....
Been there, done that.Trust?? Buddy this is a HONESTY issue,not to mention trust as well. She's still lying to you. In fact I'd venture to say that she doesn't even care how you feel. Get an divorce attorney and let the two ';players'; have each other. It's only a matter of time before they'll start cheating on each other. Try to find someone that doesn't have so many honesty issues. I know it HURTS. Unfortunately she deems you unworthy of an honest answer. Find someone who actually cares about you and loves you. Good luck...
she hid it because she knows it's wrong to have an affair
You can't keep harping on it, you know she called and seen this man. What you have to decide now is well you ever be able to trust her again and do you still want to be married to a cheater.
There is no short answer here, unfortunately. But I can tell you a marriage that is perfect, isn't perfect at all. It's human nature to be interested in other people, in a natural sense we are creatures driven by sex. In other ways we are driven by the environment we were raised in and we are molded by the surroundings and people we live and associate with. When we get married, we have to learn how to be married. Too many people think when you get married that married life is just an extension of single life.


Being married is about the love between two people. For me, love is about honesty, loyalty, trust, faithfulness, and so on. All those words by definition and indeed the actions surrounding those words are what love is to me. Honesty, for instance is one word involved with love and marriage most people don't truly understand. We all think we know that honesty is always telling the truth, when asked or when a situation arises to take back the $10 change a store clerk gave us, when we should have only gotten $5. Although that is a good example of honesty, it's not the true honesty of a marriage.


The honesty of a marriage is sharing with your spouse who you really are. Exposing your fears and showing them your worst. For instance, imagine that your wife was always in the company of men, predominantly in social situations rather than women. That might mean she feels more comfortable around men because she had a great relationship with her father and not her mother. She should identify that to herself and you. So sometimes it's not all that easy to identify why we behave the way we do, but there are reasons. And that's why it is important to have good communications in any relationship, especially marriage. By doing so, we can talk out everything and learn about each other and help each other and grow together.


I can tell you, first hand, if she is hiding something about that man, she does care about you, because if she didn't care, she would simply tell you everything to maybe hurt you, but she is hiding it. Also, she knows it鈥檚 wrong and she knows where she belongs, I suggest you work with her, but don't beat around the bush. Make her understand how you are feeling about this and make her commit to you and promise to stay away from this guy or any guy in the future. You might consider also talking to her to understand why she thought it was important to have contact or be a part of the relationship she had with this other guy. Is there something missing in her life, something she needs from you, a parent or some fulfillment she isn't getting, and just maybe you can help her with that.


There is a site called www.marriagebuilders.com and in it you can find invaluable information about married and relationships. Some you may have to pay for, but there is a lot of good free information there. Check it out.


A marriage can come back from affairs and sometimes, when both people are committed and honest and open, the marriage can actually come back stronger and more purposeful than before.
She's not being honest with you for whatever reason, but trust is a major factor in any relationship. Why she chooses to have an outside life is beyond me. Consequently, she'll probably never tell you the truth and that's unfortunate. The only concern that I have is what else is she not being honest about? I would sit down with a mediator and try to get to the bottom of this, because several thoughts are probably running rampant in your head right now. Your attempts to get the truth were in vain as she is now stumbling over her words. I don't really know what to tell you other than trust has been broken. What I might do if I were in a similar situation? I don't really know, but if the truth manages to surface one day, I pray that the two of you can work out the problem. If not, seek out a marriage counselor. Good luck.
Oh my gosh..I am so sorry she did this to you. It is very hurtful when a mate does this. You and her need to sit down and really talk things through and find out why she did this and she needs to be honest with you . It will take along time if ever if you will trust her again. After your talk you will need to be true to yourself as to rather you stay with her. Sounds like she has got some growing up to do but also some people LOVE the drama they can cause. Good luck because it's not easy sorting this out.
If it took that long for her to come out with what she has;it seems to me that there may be more skeletons in her closet. How long have you been married? Where did she meet this guy? I need more specifics. Pls add more.
Boss... i wud seriously suggest u not to trust her... thats it. no hide n seek in love.... dont get in to break up.. but give her a serious warning.... which is definately serious.. n if she continues.. she is then not ur cup of tea... jst forget her... Life is not going to stop... Finally everything happens for the best...
I have had a problem recently w/ people lying to me. The worst thing you can do to me or anyone (I think) is lie to their face. What I did is I told him that if he didn't tell me the truth then I could not be his friend anymore, cause I'm not friends w/ people that I can't trust. Nobody should be in a relationship w/ somebody who they can't trust. You should tell her, first of all to listen to all that you have to say before she says anything (so she doesn't lie again before you tell her what you proposition is), then tell her this is her last chance and you want to know the whole truth, tell her that you will be less mad at her and your relationship might can be saved if she tells you the truth, then say again this is her last chance and she had better tell you the whole truth now or your relationship will be over no matter what. You need to find out the truth because then you will know what to do about it. GOOD LUCK!!!
This is the problem with cell phones and text messages. people are just to available. My ex did something similiar and a freind is going through the same. Point here is though why all the hiding and lying. In hindsight, I dont believe my ex was having a sexual affair, but what she was doing was still wrong and was a factor in our split. You have to decide for yourself if you can forgive and trust again.
Its natural to hide something when confronted. Most people don't know how to handle that. I would ask her to set aside a time, make an appointment, to talk with you. Then make it an ';easy'; honest conversation. Tell her that in order for you to both get past this she HAS to be honest. You cannot feel like she is holding back at all. You have to keep your ';cool'; during this so she feels safe telling you what happened. When all is said and done you both need to ask ';where do we go from here?'; I wish you all the best.
She's probably lying because she's hiding something..It seems like you need to let her know you want the truth...If she doesn't tell you then leave her..It seems she doesn't appreciate you and she's taking you for granted...You want to be with someone who loves you and that you can trust...So communicate see what's going on and what's missing...if things keep on going the same then you know what you need to do....
Bottom line.....This is going to cause problems until she comes clean.....
You caught her in lies several times....We lie when we know what we did was wrong.....There's more to it and you know it....
Everyone has a past. Why are you making such a big deal over an old cell phone bill. Who did she murder that you are putting her under the spot light with the questioning. If you are now living together then start your life look ahead not backwards.

Women only: ';Period talk';...I need some advice.?

Im a little scared to talk to my mom about this. Ok so Im 18 years old. I get my period every 4-6 months at the least. When I do get it, its super heavy. For the past few years, the cramps have been tolerable. But every now and then they are so awful that Ive actually blacked out/fainted and it feels like my face is burning off (yes its pretty bad). I went to the doctor once for this when I was like.....15, She offered to give me birth control pills to stop my periods, but my mom says this will affect me later in life when I want to have kids. I have no clue what to do in this situation. I literally am afraid of getting my period and randomly passing out somewhere, plus my periods are so irregular its weird. Anyone have any suggestions or any tips on what I can do???? It would be really helpful, thanks!Women only: ';Period talk';...I need some advice.?
You poor thing - that sounds horrible.





Your periods are extreme enough to cause some major health issues for you and you need some impartial medical advice.





Birth control pills do NOT affect your fertility nor your chances at having a baby later in life.


They will be likely to give you regular periods - to reduce your pain and amount of bleeding.





I would suggest that you have a full check up anyhow. It does not sound normal to have such excruciating periods nor so irregular. It may be that you have some hormone issues that can easily be fixed. Maybe something else is going on that is causing you such terrible pain- (i dont mean anything sinister) A blood test may also be helpful to see if the amount of loss is affecting your health - you may be low in iron (anaemic)





I don't think it is fair that you have to live in fear of getting them at any old time and passing out.





Go and talk to an RN or at a Womens Clinic where they can give you a proper check up - give you sensible advice and let you know what your options are.Women only: ';Period talk';...I need some advice.?
You need to go back to your doc and get this treated. It is nothing to be scared to talk to your mother about as she is aware of your problems but just not aware of how severe they are. See your doc and get this taken care of.
Do you mean weeks not months? If you are only getting your period every 4-6 MONTHS you are having trouble and need to see a doctor. Y r u scared to talk to your mom? She will probably try to comfort you then tell you to see a dr. Good luck!
first off you said every 4-6 mths did you mean weeks? if it is mths then you should definiately be going to a dr asap! if you did mean weeks, then thats different, but normally it should be i time a mth-withthe kind of pain you say you are having please see a dr anyway-something could be very wrong-but at the least they can give you something to help your pain so you dont have to suffer like that-as far as the pill -aside from all the ide effects they warn us about -it will not mess you up later in life-when you want to have kids you just need to be off it for awhile-i hope you can go tothe dr soon
definately talk to mom. you should go see a doctor and birth control can help with this. she might just have been afraid to put you on it thinking you will use it for protection as well and earlier than she hoped for you.
You shouldn't be scared to talk to your mom about this. 4 - 6 months is a long time to not have a period. Does your family have a history of endometriosis? It's just something to throw out there, I'm not saying you have it, but it's a condition often overlooked. Please check out the link.
Well if you're nervous to talk to your mom about it...you should locate your nearest planned parenthood...since u are 18 and legal..you could just go in for a consultation...and get their advice about your irregular period and the hurtful cramps...b/c like you..i get cramps just as bad..and i didn't want to go on birth control either...my gyno suggested aleve...but as for the fainting..i'm sorry i can't help
It is natural to skip some months. I do. Maybe you should go back to the doctor 3 years is a long time and they are always coming up with new ways of helping people with medical issues.
tell your mom about it and see another doctor.... considering how long you've had periods, this isn't normal!
I would recommend going back to the doctor. Most birth control does not stop your period entirely, it only regulates it.... Although taking birth control can make it initially harder to get pregnant when you want to, it's effects are almost never permanent. Some people can get pregnant right away, but some have to be off the pill for 6 months to a year. I definitely think it would be worth a delay though, it sounds like it can be dangerous when you get your period!
go see a gyno...you're 18 now and there is no reason you can't take care of yourself. i know about the bad cramps and they suck. there are things that you can do to help, but you MUST go see a dr.
It all depends on the birth control pills you choose to use, I think you should talk to your doctor and make a decision for yourself, You can always research what is available for you, You really need to talk to your doctor about this, your mom may just be worried about never having grandkids but right now your health is more important.
I think you should see an OB/GYN doctor about your problems.You might have some non life threatening issues going on that can be taken care of easily. If I could spell it I would, so here is how it sounds,,sorry: in-duh-mee-tree-osis. I
Please, please, talk to your mother and have her schedule an appointment with a gynecologist for a complete checkup, including a Pap smear. 4-6 months between periods for as long as you have been having them is wrong. If you have been sexually active, you will need to tell the gynecologist about that as well, since he/she will want to test for STDs if you have been having sex.


And don't wait...do it NOW!
You need a gynecologist. You need to rule out forms of cancer and to be checked for Endometriosis.





Birth Control pills are the first thing used to defend against Endometriosis. Having your periods on a regular basis may prevent the excessive bleeding you have been experiencing.





My daughter tried the B.C. shots to prevent her from having any periods because the pain was interrupting her schooling. This resulted in a loss of calcium which is needed for the body to flush out fat ... so after 6 month and gaining too much waist line she went back to the oral birth control.





It all depends on where the growth of cells are attaching to what part of the uterus or tubes. I learned this from a friend who lived with it. Main thing is, don't wait too long to find out.





It's time to talk to your mother ... and if she never suffered, she will probably not understand. I didn't till I read it. But, I'm sure she will understand if some day she wants to hold a grandchild.
Birth control will not affect you later in life when you want to have kids. If that was *ever* true (which i doubt), it was when you mother was twelve.





Birth control pills have SOOOOO many advantages and so very little disadvantages. ***You will thank yourself for it if you take them.!***





You're a legal adult. You can see your doctor and talk to her without discussing any of this with your mother. Tell your doctor what is happening and ask her what is *right* for you...
Going on the pill will regulate your cycles and will NOT have any effect on your future fertility. Your mother was misinformed. I would go ahead and go to the doctor to discuss your problems and fears. Actually, go to a few different doctors, so you know that you know exactly what your options are. That's my advice. :)
birth control pills doesn't always help. They can also cause other health problems too. I had mini strokes on them. If you don't get pregnant the first month off of them it is harder to get pregnant. You need morphine or something strong.
that sounds like somthing more the a period talk u need to go to a doctor thats very unhealthy and unsafe u need to get help with that cause there could be somthing wrong.but if al elts fails MIDOL!(its my best friend when it comes to the little visit from my monthly friend)
I would talk to a gynecologist about your problem. Honestly, talk to your doctor about your specific concerns and ask your DOCTOR about the long term side effects of birth control or other options, and then make an informed decision about what you want to do.
You can get something like Ponderstan over the counter at the chemist for cramps.I think you have to take it early in the period for it to be efective.Hope you are eating[properly as well with plenty of iron rich foods.Maybe you should think about another checkup.
First off, birth control pills don't stop your period, they just regulate it. I would see your doctor and talk about non-birth control options. If your doctor will offer you nothing, then get a new doctor. There are several other options to both a)regulate your period and b) to make it tolerable. I would not recommend birth control. There are MANY side effects, some more serious than others:





Weight gain


Increase or decrease in acne


Nausea and vomiting (particularly for the first few cycles)


Dizziness


Headaches


Depression


Vaginal infections


High blood pressure


Loss of libido


Blood clots in legs, lungs, heart or brain


Stroke


Liver tumors (rare)


Heart attacks


Gallstones (rare)


Jaundice (rare)


Possibly cervical cancer


Ectopic pregnancy


Certain cancers


Spotting and irregular vaginal bleeding


Longer periods


Amenorrhea for extend periods


Headaches


Anxiety and nervousness


Pain in lower abdominals


Dizziness


Loss of libido


Depression


Increase or decrease in acne


Skin rash or darkened patches of skin


Appetite changes


Weight gain


Tender breasts


Increase or decrease in facial and body hair


Possibly hair loss


Vaginal discharge


Bone density loss


Enlarged ovarian follicles


Pain or itching (usually for a brief period of time)


Decrease in fertility and in rare cases, infertility





Talk to your doctor and let them know you need help. If you want to try the pill, you may, but beware of side effects! I really hope you get your periods under control! Good Luck.
by answering this question i could possibly put you in more danger than you are in now... please dont try to ask for help of this nature on yahoo answers! you need medical help..please dont let this one slide... why shud u be afraid to talk to your mom? this isnt ur fault! ask for help...U NEED IT.
Return to the doctor. Birth control pills are a good way of regulating when and how long the period will be. The doseage of hormone used is much less than a few years ago so affecting future pregnancy isn't the concern that it used to be. There is also medication available to lessen the pain of cramps. Heavy periods can also lower your level of hemoglobin in the blood so she/he can check your blood too. If you have anemia, that could cause fainting/weakness.

WOMEN: Did I give this guy good advice?

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;鈥?/a>





I hate giving the tough love, but he forced my hand. Did I just save this guy from humiliation?WOMEN: Did I give this guy good advice?
Yes! Good for you. In 99% of cases if you just DO what you feel is right - you will be right!!!





Men are awesome logical thinkers.


Even if a guy doesn't know what to do himself...


If you tell him the truth --- and you KNOW it,


he will THANK you for it.





But women are not like that.





The more truth you tell a woman,


the more angry she's going to get,.





FEMALE ANGER IS THE WEATHERVANE OF TRUTH.





Which is more important??


Running around making some silly girl ';happy';?


Buying her gifts and telling her what she wants to hear?





.... or doing what you know is right.





I rest my case.WOMEN: Did I give this guy good advice?
Yes, you def did! The poor guy, how can he even consider giving this girl a gift. He is probably her ';better than my boyfriend, but I would never date him guy';. No, he needs to find a girl who will love him, he sounds sweet!
You gave him bad advice, im not being rude, but what's so bad about getting your best friend a gift?


Nver mind, you gave your opinion, you have the right to.
offtopic:Man I am in the exact situation as the guy in askmen.com pg2. After I told a girl I liked her she started ignoring me and we're back to being friends permanently. I also cannot get her off my mind.
I'd say it was pretty reasonable advice.
u sounded soo sure giving that advice!! n now u r coming here wondering if u gave him good advice!!!!


....if u r right good 4 u!! if u r wrong, that guy is screwd!!
lmfao, i totally agree with you. 10 *high fives* to you.
because you tried yes..
Can it Cool-Aid man! I've got a sling-shot!
well u gave the right answer..i support you..xD
  • eye makeup
  • What advice do you have for guys that are afraid to cry in front of women?

    It's alright to cry. Go ahead. It doesn't make you less of a man.What advice do you have for guys that are afraid to cry in front of women?
    I have a loving husband and 3 happily married grown sons.


    I have seen all cry since they are grown for varied %26amp; very emotional reasons.


    After a service honering WW2 Vets, my oldest son hugged his father %26amp; told him he never realized what all they had gone through %26amp; he thanked his Father %26amp; cryed right there in the atrium of this big church. He was not ashamed. It was a beautiful thing to see. Men have hearts %26amp; feeling %26amp; compassion. I think REAL MEN CRY. That particular son is our ROCK. He calls %26amp; keeps up with us and the rest of the family. I almost died in 2004 and I seen tears from all of them. Don't hide your feelings. Open up %26amp; be real.


    God bless all who read this. I hope you received a blessing and got the message. ~~~~~JillWhat advice do you have for guys that are afraid to cry in front of women?
    dont cry................. y should u do it....... its so shameful do u no tat??
    Fear Not.

    Women of Christ i need some advice!?

    Okay so I am 13 and a young woman of Christ. I believe in that true love waits and i haven't even had my first kiss yet. Anyways I met this guy at a church family camp and we were talking and we admitted to haveing feelings for eachother a couple of days ago but today he texted me and said '; I can't wait to hold you'; and im not sure how to react to that. What is your advise?





    P.S im a freshman and he is a sophmoreWomen of Christ i need some advice!?
    13 yr old freshman? kudos.





    My advice would be to not get involved with any boys right now. Focus on school.Women of Christ i need some advice!?
    I know how you feel... I met a boy just like that.. It was an awesome feeling. but thats all it was a feeling. and as a young woman of God, I think you should keep yourself pure. wait for the right time. I know you don't want to but when God shows you who he wants your first kiss to be and who he wants to be holding you, You won't just FEEL amazing, it will be amazing, God has plan for your life, and there is temptation, right now your 13 and satin is tryin to get you now because your so young, so watch out, he can be tricky just make sure you pray, pray and pray some more! NEVER stop








    and rememeber... The right thing at the wrong time is still wrong..
    Well, I was born into a Christian household to Christian parents and I'm a sophmore, so I can relate.





    Listen, take this from someone who has been there. He can mean that he can't wait to see you and hug you again because of his feelings for you. Before you do anything you regret, make sure he knows how you feel.





    I advice you to talk to him about the boundaries of your relationship, such as no sexual contact before marraige (sp?), when and where it is safe to meet, rules, etc. Trust me, I did NOT do this in my previous relationship and things turned out HORRIBLE. Plus, you are young and if this is not the guy God wants for you, you will know very soon. Remember, actions speak louder than words. If he seems too ';grabby'; make sure you set him straight. Love means respect and pacience. If not, it is just lust, like in Romeo and Juliet. (and look how that turned out!)





    Anyways, you two should have ';the talk'; before something is done that ruins your relationship with him. Trust me, some things ARE unrepairable, relationships being one of them. If you want to talk more in depth, just message me through my profile and we can e-mail each other.





    Hope I was of help!!!! Have a blessed day and God Bless!!!!
    theres nothing wrong with a hug .. if he wants more hes playing u ...
    You are young, I think you need to be wise even though it will be hard for you to hold back it might be wiser too.


    Ask God for guidance.
    Sounds like deep down you don't think it's a good idea to get physical. So don't! If this guy is God's best for you then you're in no danger of losing him. If he's not, then you don't want him anyway trust me. I made a lot of mistakes before I finally let God be matchmaker in my life. I couldn't ask for a better husband than the one he gave me. :)
    You guys are so young, what's the rush? Feelings are just that, honey, feelings! He didnt give you a ring and you guys arent making wedding plans! LOL! You will have many feelings for many people before you even get out of your freshman year! Is he a believer also? Don't get carried away if he doesn't believe what you do. Not that you should get carried away if he says he does either! Just let him know that what he said goes against what you believe and since you just met, its a little too fast for you. And tell God all about it! He loves to hear from you and all about your day! He will give you what to say to the young man and any young man you will undoubtedly meet.
    your only 13 thats the answer.
    Boys will be boys.


    Be flattered, but keep him out of your pants.
    Well, I am 14, and also a freshman. I know how you feel. I came close to having a relationship too. I haven't had a first kiss, and I also believe that true love waits.


    What your guy said can be interpreted many ways. He may mean to hug you, or just to see you again. If he loves you, I don't think he'll mind if you ask him what he means. I doubt he means bad, since you DID meet him at a church family camp. But you are a woman of Christ. Pray, and do what you KNOW is right.





    I'm praying for you.
    Ask him specifically what he means by that phrase. It could be something completely innocent that you are misconstruing because you want to wait, which there is absolutely nothing wrong with. Talk to him about your feelings on that particular subject and explain to him why you feel that way. Who knows, maybe he feels the same way! I hope everything works out for you.
    It probably means that he'd like to hug you, to hold you in his arms and feel you close to him. I think its an awfully sweet thing to say. :)





    Just take things slowly. Don't feel pressured to kiss him until you are ready, if you decide that this is the guy you'd like to experience your first kiss with. And kisses don't have to lead to other things. Sharing a kiss or two can be just fine.
    This will only advance as far as you want it to. Do what is only comfortable for you.
    It,s O.K. to talk to boy,s at your age,just don,t let one


    lie to you to have his way,wait till you find the right one


    you will not regret it,God will help you,just keep your eye,s on


    Jesus.
    Praise God, Sister!


    I encourage you to continue to stay humble before God and seeking the Lord for his way. Please meditate and seek God for revelation regarding this scripture: Proverbs 3:5,6. I bless God for you and your desire to stay pure before God.





    1. Read the book of Esther


    2. Read Ephesian 5





    Then please write back.


    Be prayerful, God is going to reveal something to you.

    I just entered a shelter for single women in jamaica,queens i need advice ok?

    hey i just entered a shelter for single women in queens and i feel so uncomortable.


    it is 50 women in one big room that looks like a basketball court very large room.


    evryone has to change in front of each other and the whole bit.


    i am very shy woman and i am a person who dont evenlet my mom see me naked or in underwear.


    the shelter is my only option i have no where else to go.


    now the question is what would u do if it was you?I just entered a shelter for single women in jamaica,queens i need advice ok?
    how do u have a computer?I just entered a shelter for single women in jamaica,queens i need advice ok?
    deal with the uncomfortableness, this is what you have to do for a short while until you get on your feet, and these people will help you to do just that. At this point in time, you need to get the help you so desperately need and this is a safe place to be, the streets are not for you
    How about a live in job, till you get on your feet. A nanny or housekeeper, somewhere that you can have a room, make some money and start over? Good luck and God bless, hope all will go well with you. Meanwhile, do like the hippies days, wrap a blanket or sheet around you as you dress.
    sell your computer and go stay in a hotel.
    You be thankful Dear, You Have a Place to Stay. If it were Me, I'd Make the Best Of It. You Have to, for now. Something will change, you'll see. I'm sure they Have someone there You can Kinda Become friends with, and then You will be more Comfortable. Also, Do Your Part in Keeping the Place Clean, and other Chores. Time will pass faster, and they will notice you are a Good Worker. Become a Leader, and help Others........ You will be rewarded, Trust me. (smile)
    you are in a shelter with access to Yahoo answers?
    if you feel arkward about changing in front of people, take your clothes to the bathroom.





    Try to establish a relationship with one or two women.. i'm sure you have tons in common both being in the situations youre in.





    Get yourself a good paying job, SAVE SAVE SAVE %26amp; hopefully before you know it you'll be independent once again!