Here is my situation: I have been married to my husband for 2 and a half years. Nothing has gone right at all in this time,my marriage has been rocky and terrible. He has been emotionally abusive and has what seems like personality disorders,though he hasn't officially been diagnosed with anything.Someone came along into my life and I am 99% sure that I am suppose to be with this person and is my soul mate. NOT the man I am married to. My husband is currently deployed and I am trying to make plans to start a new life that God wants me to have while he is gone(because if I did this while he is home I worry for my safety). I don't mean to cheat or anything like that,I seriously believe God is wanting me to go with this other person(whom is a man of God,unlike my husband). But I am going through a spiritual war with myself ,should I just ignore this whole thing and maybe face consequences for straying away from God's plan for me? Or..should I just leave it all behind and follow God's will no matter how much I don't understand why and it hurts? Can anyone offer advice at all or help in any way?
(Also we have no children together in case anyone is wondering.)Men%26amp;Women of God,need marriage advice badly. ONLY SERIOUS ANSWERS PLEASE!?
follow your heart dear.
if you believe in god.. he will understand..
i don't..but i believe that he would want what is best for you.Men%26amp;Women of God,need marriage advice badly. ONLY SERIOUS ANSWERS PLEASE!?
Pray.
Try and work it out.
That would be what is best for you.
God put you with your husband for a reason.
If the Lord leads you to separate from your husband (not divorce), then... do it.
However, you cannot enter into a new relationship.
That will still be adultery.
Be strong.
I will pray for you.
Divorce, then go for this new guy.
If God exists, and truly loved you, why would he/she/it/they want you to stay miserable in that kind of relationship?
You know what the answer is. But it doesn't matter does it, Ashley? You're going to do what you want anyway.
You still want my advice? My advice is listen to God.
No children, no commitment. Cheat on his ***. Nobody who is emotionally abusive deserves your consideration.
You sound like a great Christian. ..........
You have God and this other guy before your husband...
sounds good to me :)
Ashley, please read this... it is NOT God's plan for you to leave your husband for another man, no matter how godly that man is. A covenant is sacred to God. you made a covenant with your spouse and with God, a sacred vow that God doesn't want you to break, no matter how hard it is. (the one loophole jesus allows in the bible is of course him cheating on you.) God can heal your hurting marriage. i was in your boat just a year or two ago, and he SAVED my marriage out of the pit. i didn't think i could forgive my husband for the things he did, and my husband is still not a godly man and we have many differences to say the least. if He can do it for me, He can do it for you. do you truly believe in romans 8:28? ALL things work together for good to those who are called according to HIS purpose. he has a plan for your marriage, maybe to save your husband.
here's an extremely helpful ministry for broken or dead marriages. all it takes is one person to stand. www.rejoiceministries.org. and if you go to charlyne.org, it's the same lady (who had her marriage restored), and she writes daily devotionals for people in hurting marriages, like you. please sign up for them, and God will bless you through the scriptures she gives each day.
THE BIBLE SAYS NO DIVORCE UNLESS CHEATING OR BEATING GOD WANT YOU TO PRAY FOR HIM STOP WORRYING ABOUT THAT OTHER MAN THAT IS LUSTING ..,WORRY ABOUT YOUR MARRIAGE,, YOU SHOULD OF MARRIED THE OTHER GUY BUT YOU NEED YOU SOME PRAYING OIL AND TAKE IT TO YOU CHURCH AND HAVE IT OUT WHEN CHURCH IS GOING THEN ANNOINT YOUR HUSBANDS PILLOWS AND CLOTHES AND PRAY FOR GOD TO TO CHANGE HIS HEART AND WATCH GOD WORK AND WHEN GOD DOES IT DONT WORRYT ABOUT THE OTHER GUY CUZ YOU WILL BE IN THE WRONG, DONT DIVORCE WHATEVER YOU DO. WE ALL HAVE PROBLEMS IN OUR MARRIAGE AND THAT DONT MEAN GET UP AND RUN TO ANOTHER CUZ YOU WILL BE RUNNING FOR YOUR LIFE// GET IN YOUR BIBLE AND READ AND LET YOUR HUSBAND SEE YOU CONSECRATING AND HE WILL CHANGE
If you are worried for your safetythen leaving and divorcing might make things worse. Just remember he's trained to respond to any threat with violence.
Try talking with a counsellor at the camp itself, they must have a lot of wives and girlfriends that stray whilst their man is away.
I guess you thought you really loved your husband when you married him only 30 months ago, just be sure you don't have the same shallow feelings for the new man in your life, him being another believer is not a good enough reason on it's own.
God and the universe help those who help themselves. It sounds like you intuitively understand that you have to take care of yourself and your own safety and sanity right now. Whatever you decide to do with the other person, the most important thing is to get out of the situation with your abusive partner. I was in a similar situation and felt that there was no way out, but found my way. You have a support system. Use it and get yourself into a good place away from your abuser. Then you'll be able to see more clearly if you beling with this other man or not. Best of luck, sister. You are brave and carry a light in you that deserves to be treasured, not squandered.
FIrst....be a women about it and call off your marriage with you husband face to face, not while he is out fighting for your freedom. Thats a pretty low thing to do, no matter how abusive the man is, he deserves that much from you.
If you feel this other man is sent from GOD and he is a follower of god then he will not mind sitting back and waiting for you until you and your husband are divorced.
A women should be so lost in god,
that the man will have to go thru him in order to get to her.
Good luck what eveer you decide to do [smiles]
Wow,
I really don't know what to say
Sell your house?
Buy a farm?
Live by the land, and God will keep you in His dwelling no matter your choice
God is there no matter which man you choose to be with
Be married to God, and He will treat you as you need to be treated
Us mortal men, are sinners just as much as the next
So, release yourself of all trouble and dilemma and God will show you the answer
God will show you the answer
you can answer your own question by asking His Majesty instead of us
If you were a Christian before you married this man, I know you got a warning in your spirit about this marriage. If you married him anyway, well, like so many of us, you need to ask God to change him and yourself to live in peace with each other.
Part of the problem is, (in my opinion) you have now been TEMPTED to end your marriage and God hates divorce. Moses gave a way of escape for those who committed adultery, but divorce was never God's plan.
If you are willing, and it seems you are not, but you both have been unfaithful, why not go to a good, real Christian counselor to help you, help yourself and your husband through this?
You say you are 99% sure you are supposed to be with this new guy and you say you seriously believe God is wanting you to go with this other person, I doubt seriously that God, the Creator of, marriage wants you to end the marriage (even though it may have been a mistake), and be married to another.
The spiritual warefare you are in is real, and its' God's Spirit convicting, not condeming you to do what's right and you know what that is already.
If you do what you are lead by God to do, He has a way of REWARDING OBEDIENCE. Your husband has been deployed, he probably is suffering emotionally in that situation and is confused and hurting.
If you decide to stick it out by prayer and a change in your attitude, he, your husband may and probably will also change. Remember, the Word says, and I'm paraphrasing, an unbelieving husband (or wife) will be changed by his Christian's wife's lifestyle.
I hope and pray for God's will to be done in this situation, I'm prayer for you both.
It seems like you've already made up your mind, but I'll give my advice anyway. First, read the verses below. Second, if this other guy is such a strong believer, why would he be willing to get involved with a married woman? Third, I know deployments can be tough on a marriage (my husband's deployed right now also), but you made a commitment to him before God, and you need to take it very seriously.
And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife...But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? 1 Corinthians 7:13-16a
You need to work out your marriage with your husband. At least try. If it comes to the point where the emotional abuse is overwhelming and his personality disorder is directly harming you to the point where you two can't live or work with each other, I'd Biblically study divorce.
I don't really like the idea of divorce, but you're truly caught between a rock and a hard place.
Furthermore, this man could very well be a temptation to cheat on your husband. I would definitely not look into getting more involved with said man until you (if you decide to) divorce your husband. Satan knows what's happening to you. He knows your marriage is crumbling and he wants nothing more than to make you weak so that he can destroy you and your marriage.
Here's what I suggest:
*Try your hardest to reconcile with your husband. Counseling, talking it out, frequent outtings with each other...the works. See if you can get this personality disorder diagnosed because it'll be safer for the both of you...emotionally and physically.
*Read what God has to say about divorce. Make your decisions accordingly.
*After getting a divorce, if you so choose, don't jump into a serious relationship with this other man. You need time to cool off and get stronger with God and get your life together before you fling yourself into the arms of a man who (possibly) only looks good as of now because of the predicament you find yourself in. Get to know him as a friend first and take things slowly. The grass is always seems greener on the other side.
*Make sure this man is a Christian and truly follows God. You do not want to marry someone unequally yoked again.
MOST IMPORTANTLY!!!!!: Stay strong in God's Word and become closer to Him. Only then will you find peace with yourself, your marriage, your husband, and this other man.
God bless :D I hope everything works out for you...and as long as you put God first and not your flesh...it will.
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