Right now I’m 26, and in a couple of months I will be 27. I’ve only been on three group dates in my whole life. I’ve never been on any single one on one dates. I’ve never been on any second dates, and from all that you probably can guess that I’ve never had a girlfriend nor have I ever kissed, held hands, etc. I’ve also never been on any dates where I asked a girl on a date. I’ve only asked one girl on a date in my lifetime, when I was 23 back in 2005, but she said she had a boyfriend.
Basically, the first date I went on was when I was 22, almost 23. There was this girl who was probably special needs who asked me to a school dance at college. It was a group date because she was with this group of other people, and for a meal beforehand we were with the group. Then the second date I went on was a blind group date where we went to a college basketball game when I was 23. Then when I was still 23, this one guy set me up on a blind date with one of his high school friends and I doubled with one of my roommates. Basically it was a pizza restaurant and bowling. My date seemed really cold. My roommate spent $70 because he was enjoying himself, which I had to split with him.
Will she think that I’m too weird and decide to stay away from me, if she finds out? Will she wonder, “If he’s almost 27 and hasn’t been on dates, there’s probably something wrong, and you have to wonder about him. I’ll just avoid him without giving him a chance”? Like, I heard this one guy say that he has an uncle who’s 50 and he’s never been on a date before in his life. However, I don’t think that would be something to brag about. If that guy were to start asking women on dates, a lot of them probably would wonder what’s up with his dating past and maybe stay away from him just because of that.
So what should I do about my situation? Do women ask men about past dates they’ve been on and past relationships? Will this hurt me? Is there something I can do for damage control so that it doesn’t hurt my ability to go on a date or even develop a relationship later on?
Women: Please help, I need advice!?
In my opinion the worst part is you've missed out on valuable experiences. Dating is hard and a mind game in itself; when dating other people you learn a lot about yourself and what you want and desire for yourself and the other person; especially long-term relationships teach you this.
I personally would stay away from you (sorry) b/c I wouldn't want to go through all the new relationship experiences with you just for you to learn what you want and decide it's not me. Also, I wouldn't want to go through all the arguments someone's first/second/etc. relationship goes through until you understand how irrelevant and wasteful arguing can be. ALTHOUGH, I might date you just for fun, but wouldn't take it serious and might laugh when you start arguing about irrelevant things; I say this b/c although I'm 25 yrs old and should probably be looking for a serious relationship, I don't want one right now.
Of course it doesn't mean that you're out of the dating game. I believe a person SHOULD go through at least 3 relationships (of longer than 3-6 months) before they settle down with anyone person.
In this day in age people are getting married at an older age anyway, so I would suggest that you date younger girls (21-24) until you get an idea of what you're truly looking for. I suggest this, b/c older girls are going to want serious relationships and the younger girls are still out just trying to have fun; this way no one really gets hurt and you get the experience you need.
I believe all partners start asking questions about previous relationships. I believe some girls will think it's weird you haven't dating at your age, but some girls will think it's cute and be intrigued by it. I would probably white lie it and keep your past a mystery. It's not really lying, you just avoid questions about it or keep your answers short. Maybe say you've been too busy to date, but have came across some really nice girls in the past that you felt you couldn't act on b/c you didn't have the time at that point to invest in those girls.
Women: Please help, I need advice!?
Don't worry about anything my friend,
take it easy and set your mind free.
it isn't such a complicated situation!
Just enjoy yourself.
I wish you the best.
Please forgive me! I am not a woman
No; absolutely not. Any girl who doesn't like you because of your experience, is not worth your time, don't worry about it.
wow what a weird guy
what that first girl said is absolute balleex mate.
your not weird!!! the girl will probably think its very cute..
it will also make her feel special!! also! its better to be in your situation than look like an absolute man whore!
if the girl doesnt accept this then she really aint worth your time!!
just be honest with her... and be nice =]
Best of luck mate!
xox
Just don't go into detail - if she asks, just say something like 'not many.' If she asks why, just say you never felt you had a good connection with anyone, or that you're shy. I mean, don't lie to her, but you don't necessarily need to go into all this detail.
I personally would think it's uncommon, but wouldn't use the word 'weird.'
You have to realize that the eventual (hypothetical if you keep on like this) love of you life isn't going to care. Don't let a shy past keep you from being confident; or, find a girl you can be really confident with.
Usually only girls with their own insecurities ask such stupid questions, anyway. Some people are just careful shoppers when it comes to dating.
Point is: who cares? Confidence is sexy; play it off.
My son is 28 and just had his first real girlfriend. And no she did not think he was weird at all. In fact he kinda dumped her after a while because she wouldn't stop talking about her past relationships. (and ALL the sex she had with them)
First of all, you don't need to tell someone your whole life story on your first few dates. If she asks, you only have to say..I've been on a few dates, they didn't work out.
Believe it or not, you are not the only guy out there who hasn't dated at your age, there's nothing wrong with you. If you are like my son, he's really shy and thinks it's more important to find a girl he really likes and respects and not just date for the sake of dating.
But he had the same questions and feelings as you do. Just because you are not average, doesn't make you weird or wrong.
Truthfully, most girls (ones that matter anyway) will be thrilled that you don't have a slew of ex girlfriends.
Relax, accept who you are, if a girl doesn't like you, there are a gazillion more who will.
Oh and yeah, girls will ask. You can say something like..I've been focusing on my career more than dating or you've just never met someone before that really interested you. Girls ask, but they sure don't wanna hear that your some big man ho ;)
Just be honest about the relationships you've had, but try to buffer the truth. Tell her the girls you dated didn't seem to 'fit' or were taking things too 'fast' for you or some such thing. Girls tend to be pretty forgiving of a guy who just wound up with the wrong girl.
I am a 25-year-old women who has never been on a date in her life. I have kissed men (and women, for that matter), but never actually gone out with any and never gotten to third base, so I know where you're coming from. Everyone keeps telling me it's never too late to fall in love. Maybe that's true.
If your girl decides not to see you again just because your previous dates didn't work out, it just means she's judgmental and is basing her opinion of you on too little information. If this happens and you still want to give the relationship a shot, try explaining that she is not like the other girls you dated and that she is really special. It might work.
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