I really need some ADULT advice about dating younger men, from older women if possible..??

I know I already asked this question but I think mostly unexperienced teens answered


I need some dating tips, what should I expect from a younger guy early 20's, what should I not do, what is the downside to this type of relationship ?


Do I have to wait for them to mature, or can I mold him..?? If you've dated or married a younger guy, please adviseI really need some ADULT advice about dating younger men, from older women if possible..??
I married a guy younger than me. He will want to play more. Most guys in their early 20's are still into things like video games and it isn't something you can just break them of over night. Don't talk about marriage and kids because it will send him running for the hills. Play it cool. And what ever you do, don't start acting too bossy or nagging him. If you are much older than him, all he will see is that you are trying to be his mother. Dating a younger guy and even marrying a younger guy can be wonderful. They aren't whipped by the responsibilities of the world so they are more care-free and they can add more spice to your life. Just remember that while an older woman dating a younger man can put you into a different category with your friends, it can do the same for him. Be prepared. If there are quite a few years between the two of you, don't be surprised if his own peer group have some snarky comments about you dating. From somewhat nice (hey, it's Stiffler's Mom) to calling you a cougar. If you don't know these references, Stiffler was a character in the movie American Pie and one of his friends got the priviledge of sleeping with his mom. A cougar is a slang term to describe a 35+ year old female who is on the ';hunt'; for a much younger, energetic, willing-to-do-anything male. If this does happen, just chalk it up to the fact that they are threatened by you and have fun. Be mindful that many men, regardless of age, are out to have fun but not necessarily in for a relationship. Make sure you establish what you are after first. If all you want is a man that can go all night, you will find some one out there eager to prove they can. If you want the relationship thing, it can get a little tougher. Most men in this age group are not looking for the domestic bliss relationship. Sowing their wild oats and making memories is for them. If you are lucky you will find a 22-23 year old and have a few good years of fun and then he will mature into the guy who is ready to marry. That's how it happened for me. Now we have wedded bliss but my guy is still in his 20's and I am in my 30s so the fun still continues. Good luck and remember that the best way to approach any relationship is to think about the person first, age second. Have fun.I really need some ADULT advice about dating younger men, from older women if possible..??
First of all what's your age, I'm 45 and i, myself would not date 20 year olds, or around that age, because i would feel like if he is like my son's age. Maybe 35 year olds or older sounds better. Good luck
Early 20's? Well, they are still basically unsure of themselves and the world around them. Depending on the kind of guy you get, he's probably more into having fun and collecting possessions.





Don't make references to the age gap, remember that he's probably a little sensitive to it as well. It's not unlike dating someone your age so just go with what feels comfortable.





Have fun, don't try to mother or mold him, he'll resent it if you do.
well, i'm your girl for this Answer. I haven't dated (or married!) anyone close to my own age since i was 23. I've always dates younger men, by choice. I've always been more attracted to them %26amp; vice versa.





Anyway, my second marriage was to a man 6 years my junior...although we're now divorced, it had absolutely nothing at all to do w/his age. we also have a lovely daughter....we were married/together for about 10 years.





I am now again married to another man, only he's 9 years younger(!) -- %26amp; HE'S THE BEST.





bear in mind when you date a younger guy -- esp. one in their 20's (which I also did when I was nearing 30 %26amp; fell MADLY in love with), you have to understand that they may still have to sow some wild oats %26amp; may not be ready to settle down, if that's what you're looking for (or even commit to one woman)...a few are mature enough to know what they want, whether it's a future w/you or not will tell you if you ask, which is good (but don't have that conversation too early on in the relationship -- you'll scare the snot ouf of the poor thing!).





IMO, each man should be judged invidividually by what YOU expect. be frank %26amp; honest with yourself %26amp; any potential guy %26amp; you won't go wrong. DO NOT try to manipulate, convince or 'wait it out' w/some youngster that you're smitten with %26amp; want to keep forever if he's not thinking the same thing! it won't work %26amp; you'll be the one getting hurt in the end.





I wouldn't count on the whole 'molding' thing either -- people don't ever truly change...sure, they grow %26amp; mature, but basically stay the same deep down inside.





i hope this was helpful.





if you have any more questions, feel free to ask ;-)
I have dated a younger guy. I had problems from the get-go. Most younger men are immature and you can be my guest to try and mold them but its hard! They have a tendancy to be controling and want to know your every move. And when it comes time for an anniversary forget it! They will be spending that night out with their buddies drinking or at a club. Also, if they are in their early 20's means they probably don't have a career yet. So be prepared to eat out at McD's alot and get cheap gifts. You will be the bread winner hunny! However since they are younger, sometimes they are pure and sweet. They havent had the chance to become bitter by the world and often want to have fun! So there are ups and downs just like any relationship. I certainly don't regret dating a younger guy, but it just didnt work out for me. Good luck!
A few years ago, I dated a guy young enough to be my son. Though he wanted to continue the relationship, I broke it off pretty quickly. We had very few things in common (we both liked coffee and hockey), and very different viewpoints on everything. We simply did not see the world the same way. I would get impatient with him, and then realize it was just his lack of life experience. So, my impatience was unfair, but it was still there. I really don't know how you develop a true partnership kind of relationship with someone from a different generation.
they'll do you like any young kid would cuz older women are a novelty. then they will get tired of the novelty and dump you for someone their own age. by the time they mature, they will say, ';what am I doing with this old bag?'; so if you want to have a fling, go for it, but dont expect anything beyond that.
One recommendation--don't keep referring to the age difference, such as ';Oh, when I was your age...';
His education, work, and the meaning of fun might be different from yours. Expect that he might not be able to call you 24/7 or he might be the type to call 24/7. And in the time when he can't reach you or you reach him. Patient is a must. Next thing to think about is money. He doesn't having saving, so long vacation or even buying a ticket is a problem. So the budget of a marriage, honeymoon, or even having a child will be a problem in time wise.
Consider yourself damn lucky is you find a 20 some year old guy that has a strong direction to life, knows how to budget money, has no issues, isn't clingy and is wise beyond his years.
My 'adult' advice is that unless you enjoy the fact that your younger guy is a boy toy for you and can overlook his immaturity or embrace it, you shouldn't waste your time. Molding him? Most of us have a rough time 'molding' our kids; why would you even want to worry about molding your significant other? Well, I have an ex-sister-in-law who I love who is also into 'younger' men...she's presently dating a guy who is not so much younger and I really believe she is starting to 'get' it. The conventional wisdom about not being able to change anyone but yourself holds true -- no matter the age of the subject!!! If you just want the thrill of the chase and the fact that you are still appealing enough to 'score' with a younger guy, you go for it...just keep the molding and sculpting for an art class! Personally, I'm much more attracted to older and monied -- you know, those mature guys who know how to wine and dine a woman and understand romance...
I have dated younger guys, and the sex was awesome, but they seemed to have too much baggage for me (being an older woman). Most were dealing ex wives and child support or bad credit etc.. stuff I didn't want to deal with. Not saying ALL young guys are in the same situation. As for maturity, good luck finding that in a man at any age.
I'm not sure on what to tell you...





But I am 27 currently dating a 36 year old woman. It's pretty good. No complaints.





Before that I was dating a 20 year old girl. That is something I will never do again.





Early 20's should be okay for you... depending on your age... I mean if you're 50 something that would be bad.





And the suggestion to not keep referring to the age difference is great advice.
Hi, I'am Marissa 34 female from Wisconsin, and am seeing Corey and he is 18 going on 19. I'am divorced for 3 years. I have never been so happy. I feel free and young again. With Corey, my first and only young guy, I had to make all the moves. I was nervous at first, but it turns me on. Email us if you want, Myself and my Corey can answer anything.
';Mold '; him?


No, he is too old and you might make him jump hoops for sex but after the orgasms are over your magic powers over him are gone for good.


Thats a fact hon I have seen it too often.First treat him with respect and expect him to be immature and childish at times, he is still growing.


Also, no sex for that will really confuse things and neither of you will think and see things as they are.You will have too much emotion invested before getting to know one another.


This is just common sense hon.
First





you should expect from him to want to have SEX ... mucho.. that's the every guy's dream, hook up with an old lady





Second





Do not say ';omg you're like a little kid for me'; or ';when I was your age'; or stuff like that.. never talk about the age difference





third





the downside is if he is not really in love with you .. he will prolly leave you and find a young girl later after messing around with you... usually to be with an older women is just a fantasy for most men so If he is serious about you, everything is gonna be okay... so if you are looking for something serious you better make you how he feels about you if you dont want to get hurt...





Good luck
Go with the flow-
I married a younger guy we have been together 30+ years it is just like any relationship you get what you put in . If you are looking for someone to mold I say forget about it. You have to start with someone who can have a conversation after sex or you will get bored. Men mature at different ages just like women so maybe his age doesn't matter. My husband is 5 years younger but he has always been more mature then his age . What can he offer you or do you have bring everything to the table? You can have a baby, you don't need someone to raise.
I almost said, ';Some Lube';. But I really have no idea.
I think if you want a serious realtionship looking for a guy in his early 20's probably isn't the best way. For most guys that age, marriage or being tied down in a relationship is the last thing that they want. So, make sure from day one that you both are on the same page. Also, trying to ';mold'; someone isn't a good idea. You should like the person for who they are, not for what you want them to be. I have no idea how much of an age gap you are talking about here...
It depends on the circumstances!





First of all, you CANNOT ';mold'; him!! Don't EVER go into any relationship with the intent of trying to change someone! It probably won't happen and you will end up very frustrated!!





My girlfriend (42) dated a younger guy (24). It was the biggest mistake of her life! She ended up being nothing but a fantasy he was trying to fulfill. Once he had accomplished that, he dumped her. His excuse....I want a family and you cannot provide that for me. Although he was correct, he used her for sex and broker her heart.





Another friend (37) dated a younger guy (25) and ended up getting married to him. They are still married 7 years later and very happy. They have 2 children together.





You just have to be careful and be sure that you are both looking for the same things.
First you shouldn't be going into any relationship trying to decide if you should mold someone. Date the person and stop trying to predict what to do. If it's going to work it will.
I am 40 and I married someone who is now 52. She is the most beautiful person I have ever met. I can't imagine life with a younger woman. I had dated a lot of them too.
Whenever I encounter younger men I don't think about the age difference. I've dated several and enjoy the company, but eventually we have to socialize with our friends, that's when the age difference becomes an issue. There are a number of young men who are more mature and experienced than men my age. I would rather date them but I wouldn't establish a long term relationship. It wouldn't be fair to the guy who will be stuck with a senior citizen in 20 years or more. When I meet a young man I usually establish the boundaries up front , saves having a long heart wrenching goodbye.
If you think you need to 'mold' someone you are the immature one and need to work on your own life before ruining someone else.
well i am 46,and my partner off 19 months is 35,we never mention ages or nothing like that,wow hon the first thing you must not do is try to mold him,,he is a human being just the same and if he wants too date an older woman fair be it,we have a great relationship,and one off the most important things is too never go on and on about the age difference,,why should you anyway,you are together because you want too be,if you keep on n on about it do you want to be like his mother,,,,,anyway good luck too youxxxxxxx
I dated a guy that was 3 years younger than me. It was very hard. It went on for 4 months...we had fun...but then we had some issues too. Like when we hung out with his friends..they are all his age. It made me feel a little weird cause I wasn't into what they were. Plus he wasn't 21 yet, so we couldn't go to the places that I wanted to. Some ladies can date younger guys..and it works for them. but just be careful...he might pull the ';i'm not ready for that yet';, or ';i'm going to a house party'; stuff like that. Molding isn't going to happen, but you can just tell him exactly what you look for in a guy and find out if you guys can make it. Good Luck.