Women Only Please: Is this an appropriate e-mail to my ex, I'm sorry it's so long, I really need advice badly?

This isn't the email yet, but I just wanted to give some background. We broke up a couple of months ago, and I have spent that time reading self help books, seeing a psychologist, working out and down to 0-1 cigarrettes a day. She was talking to another guy that lives 2 hours away (set up through a friend) She said she would be with me if she knew that the changes I have made were perminent. She just told this guy that she was confused and he told her she needs to choose. So she then told me that she didn't think that we would work out. Raya is her 23 months old daughter from a previous relationship.





HERE IS THE EMAIL AFTER I LEFT HER HOUSE LAST NIGHT.





Sarah,


I'm sorry that this is long, but I have a lot on my mind. It is very important to me that you read this. Please read the whole thing. I can't always put what I want to say into words.





This is Simon and Garfunkel - Kathy's Song ';Live 1969'; (link is at the bottom of the page). I wanted you to hear this because in manifesting my desires I envisioned me playing this song to you at our wedding. I still know that you love me and maybe someday I will sing/play this to you and it will be our wedding day. I'm sorry I didn't get the chance to prove to you that I have, and continue to, change, and I know that if I could erase that fear from your mind that you would be with me.





I know that you are still confused, and for whatever reason, you are saying we can't talk because this guy told you to choose. I don't think that's fair. It's strange that the very day he finds out that you are confused he says you need to choose. I feel that if he really cares about you, he would understand that you are confused and give you time to make up your own mind. You said that you wanted to make this decision on your own, but I can't help but feel that there are outside influences on your decision i.e. this guy and some of your friends.





I have been nothing, but caring and understanding through this whole thing. I feel very hurt by what I am hearing from you. I have worked extremely hard on improving myself, and I will continue to do so. I have been doing absolutely everything in my power to be a better man, the man you deserve. I know that I was starting to prove that.





I don't understand how we can be getting along so well, and within one night, you want nothing to do with me. If you are 100% sure that you don't want to be with me, then why did you hang out with me, say it was cute watching me play with Raya, say that it was nice spending time with me, watch movies with me, go to lunch with me, go shopping with me, have me stay the night, ask me what I wanted for Christmas, lay in bed with me and let me message you, and even tonight you were considering having me over to watch a movie. The night I was messaging you, I took off my shirt for bed and you just stood and stared with that look on your face, then grabbed your crotch and walked into your bedroom and asked me to come tuck you in. Also, when I was laying with you, you started breathing heavy when I was tickling you, and you were tickling me in return. I know you still Love me and want to be with me, but you are unsure if this is the way I am going to stay. I think you are still confused, but he gave you an ultimatum of sorts, and your fear of us going back to the way we were is stopping you from choosing me or at least continuing to give me a chance. I don't know how else to prove to you that I am dedicated to being the man you and Raya Love, I know that if I had more time, you would see that I am here to stay, and your fears would wash away.





I know that my actions from before to now are like night and day, but I'm telling you I Have Changed. One of the things I realize now is that pleasure in life is not derived from self gratification, but from making the ones you Love happy, and anything you get in return is a bonus.





Self help research and scheduling an appointment with a psychologist are not the only ways I have been bettering myself. Other than Christmas shopping I have a good amount of money in savings that I am making monthly contributions to. I have also been working out every day, and I am down to one cigarette a day and some days I won't have any. I want to have a long and healthy life, and if that's shared with you and Raya then all the better.





I'm sorry if you feel bad about the Christmas presents and stocking stuffers I got you and Raya, that wasn't my intention, I was envisioning You and Raya waking up Christmas morning and me having the stockings all ready and I was going to take you and Raya to get a little tree and have it lit. It was going to be the perfect Christmas morning, because we would be together and I imagined watching you and Raya opening your presents and having big smiles on you faces. I also imagined you two being with my family and how happy they were to see you and you to see them. It woWomen Only Please: Is this an appropriate e-mail to my ex, I'm sorry it's so long, I really need advice badly?
I think it sounds fine.





Now for you....I'm sorry, but you have to move on.I know this is totally not what you want to hear, so I am sorry, but it is the truth. To help yourself the most, you have to move on and past her. She might come back to you yes, but the chances are not excedingly high. Personally I think you sound like a much sweeter guy then that slug she is with now, but she will make her own choices. Remember that, and remember that you have to make yours.





I think of it this way-there are 24 hours in each of our days. It is compleatly up to us how we spend them. You dont HAVE to go to work or school if you want. You CAN break the law. You can do whatever you want. If you choose those hours to morn and be depresed, that is totally up to you. I personally think a much better idea is to expearience instead. It is always challanging, and you sometimes learn the greatist things. It is totally fun along the way. You could travel to foren places, learn to knit, turn a cartwheel, or go scuba diving. Try to distract your mind for now, and maybe someday you will figure out that instead of distracting yourself from a bad thing, you are past that thing and really enjoying your life.








Like I said- your 24 hours are compleatly under your control, so it is up to you if you will take my advise or not. Either way, I hope you heal inside and that things look up for you. Good Luck! :)Women Only Please: Is this an appropriate e-mail to my ex, I'm sorry it's so long, I really need advice badly?
It is beautiful.........may be you need to cut out the private things you two are having........
this letter is really pretty and it sounds like you really love this girl.this letter isnt too long b/c love knows no limits but i think you should recite the letter to her like in-person
too long, maybe u could cut it down some and don't forget to use spell check (massage)





ultimately, you can only say whats in your heart and what u feel


i think if a person changes too much for another person you could end up resenting the person you changed for.....





try for your reconciliation and if she accepts fine if not move forward knowing you did your best........good luck